Satirical News from Helena, Montana and Beyond
HELENA, MONTANA – The ads promise the same great Domino’s Pizza, delivered to you even faster and with less risky manual labor thanks to a hot new promotion: “Cut Yourself Pizza”. “Slicing pizzas is a dangerous job,” says local Domino’s…
Residents along Canyon Ferry Road are abuzz with speculation about the cause for all the sirens the other night. Gathered at the Glass Slipper Bar & Casino, a local haunt along the route of the mysterious emergency vehicles, the topic…
Partygoers at Lakeside, a rural stronghold on Hauser Lake, were treated to a rare spectacle of nature on Sunday night. As the sun dropped, a unique Flying Trout flopped through the cool spring air, just 30 feet above the water…
Montana City native Wesley “Nuff” Sedd made a big spash on national television this week. He appeared on the Wednesday night episode of Deal or No Deal. Celebrity host and legendary comic Howie Mandel welcomed Mr. Sedd into the hot…
YORK, MT – A teenage man wielding a knife was sighted at the Vigilante Campground in the late morning last Sunday, report day-use picnickers who witnessed the situation. The young man possessed a sharp-bladed utility or “pocket” knife, and was…
HELENA, MT AND SURROUNDING AREAS – Over the past month and a half, a recurrence has been taking place where local businesses have shuttered their doors. Current trends indicate that this “phenomenon” is nationwide and may or may not continue…
NORTH HELENA VALLEY – A formerly vacant lot looks to be the new home of a future business in the Helena Valley. A construction crew and heavy equipment have been seen working on a new commercial-style building. With a ten…
EAST HELENA, MT – A group of three masked men were observed entering the Town Pump at the corner of Highway 287 and South Lane Avenue on Wednesday afternoon. The men, who appeared to be approaching their 50’s, showed no…
OUTSIDE OF HELENA, MT – Brake lights were seen in front of the boathouse just after dusk on the evening of May 1st, 2020. This is unusual activity for a Friday night, particularly during these trying times. The incident lasted…
